An upcoming project behind the scenes here at MMM is to assist authors in cultivating a presence within online social networks. In doing some research and analysis before this project, a core or key question sits at the front of things: how does one approach being social?

There are two ways of looking at social networks: they can either be a part of what you do normally (online and offline networking is pretty much the same thing to you), or that online social networking is a layer on top of what you do, and is more of a learning to live digitally, than it is something you do naturally.

Some would ascribe the terms digital native and digital immigrant to these perspectives, and they wouldn’t be totally wrong. There is definitely a generational (and socio-economic) grounding towards adeptness towards the area of social networking. But, I’d like to reach past even those two generalizations to something more core – how do you connect with others?

Social networking, at its simplest, is another word for connecting people with people. Online social networks use everything from residency, to hobbies, to schooling, to even pets, in order to craft venues which allow people to connect with one another over shared interests. And while these venues are topic specific usually, the end result is usually the same, and expansion of care and influence to a segment of the global population you might not have had before.

For many people, the idea of expanding their circles into such an arena is natural, for others, its learned. In both respects, is a leaning on this understanding that if they are going to grow, mature, sell a product, or expand and influence, that they have to learn and apply skills which might knit them to a different group of people. It is this aspect, making and cultivating relationships, that stands as the big decision for engaging within social networks.

It is easy to find various communities, add your name and a means to contact you, and just be there. It is another thing entirely to invest into that community where you are adding value on the level of relationship building. This isn’t a small deal – every connection, every click, every shared status message or picture, everything will require you investing a part of your life into the lives of others.

In directing others to whether they should or should not engage within a particular social network, this is a key question, and one that should become the basis of any engagement: are you willing to invest into the life of another at the cost of something within or outside of yourself?

For some, investing within social networks has meant that they can no longer or even more than before, be a part of local community groups. It may mean that they have to own up to the consequences of past actions, but maturity and time have also granted grace and mercy before justice. It always means that there will be something or someone else buzzing your ear at a vulnerable moment – and you will have to make sound decisions whether its a good time to respond or not.

It means that you have to pay attention also to the technological and political contexts around those networks. Yes, you might be able to connect, but does a connection to a certain group compromise one of you in a spiritual, personal, or professional context in the near-future? Are you able to deal with the increased notifications, and the attention that would need to be paid to responding to some messages more immediately than others?

Does the social community/network challenge you to grow beyond your perceptions, or is it an incubation chamber for growth in what you already know, or is it an echo chamber? Do members of that community/network engage beyond those online “rooms,” or does that offline group thread life inbetween meetings with voice, text, email, or other tools?

We commonly hear that “Jesus met with everyone.” But, I think the core of his “meetings” was that he cultivated a social life that allowed him to see what the Father was doing, respond to people in need, and embed his strengths into the lives of others, enabling them to grow their lives and the lives of people around them effectively. In this age of social networking, and the many questions around how to do this well, I’d argue that we can not only draw some parallels, but also some key points:

• For all the connecting Jesus did, he spent time away from people in solo reflection and prayer
• He made sure to communicate in a way that the majority of people could understand, but left room for people to ask questions and meet with him for clarity
• He didn’t run from dissention, but also would not allow himself to get into pointless arguments
• He understood timing and the fact that not all social networks can last forever; the one that does last forever was yet to come
• He left changed from every gathering, the people he gathered with left changed

Social networks really have not changed all that much. Yes, the speed at which we can connect has changed, and certainly the tools are different. But, whether we are adept at the concept and tools, or learning our way as we go along, taking a moment to assess why we connect socially, and what that looks like is very important. And then from there, we can make steps in the direction(s) of using the right tools, around the right people, to enable them to see life in the best way possible.